d450a84d-95ba-4dd5-a38c-11d11ec210f3

Crackers Onesie

White / 12M

$25.00

d450a84d-95ba-4dd5-a38c-11d11ec210f3

1/5

Crackers Onesie

Crackers Onesie

Mediocre name. Surprisingly good shirt.

$25.00

☑️ Print that lasts

☑️ Quality materials

☑️ Made by real people

Color White Pink Baby Blue Heather Gray Red Navy Black

Size 12M 18M 6M

Size Guide

Gildan 64000 T-Shirt

Units:

Measurement	S	M	L	XL	2XL	3XL
Length	71	74	76	79	81	85
Half Chest	46	51	56	61	66	71
Length	28"	29.1"	29.9"	31.1"	31.9"	33.5"
Half Chest	18.1"	20.1"	22"	24"	26"	28"

All measurements are of the garment laid flat, not body measurements.

Gildan 18000 Crewneck Sweatshirt

Units:

Measurement	S	M	L	XL	2XL	3XL	4XL	5XL
Length	69	71	74	76	79	81	83.8	86.3
Half Chest	51	56	61	66	71	76	81.3	86.4
Sleeve Length	85	88	90	93	95	98	100.3	102.9
Length	27.2"	28"	29.1"	29.9"	31.1"	31.9"	33"	34"
Half Chest	20.1"	22"	24"	26"	28"	29.9"	32"	34"
Sleeve Length	33.5"	34.6"	35.4"	36.6"	37.4"	38.6"	39.5"	40.5"

All measurements are of the garment laid flat, not body measurements.

Gildan 18500 Pullover Hoodie

Units:

Measurement	S	M	L	XL	2XL	3XL	4XL	5XL
Length	68.6	71.1	73.7	76.2	78.7	81.3	84	86
Half Chest	50.8	55.9	61	66	71.1	76.2	81	86
Sleeve Length	85.1	87.6	90.2	92.7	95.3	97.8	100	103
Length	27"	28"	29"	30"	31"	32"	33.1"	33.9"
Half Chest	20"	22"	24"	26"	28"	30"	31.9"	33.9"
Sleeve Length	33.5"	34.5"	35.5"	36.5"	37.5"	38.5"	39.4"	40.6"

All measurements are of the garment laid flat, not body measurements.

Gildan 5200 Men's Heavy Cotton Tank

Units:

Measurement	S	M	L	XL	2XL	3XL
Length	71.1	73.7	76.2	78.7	81.3	83.8
Half Chest	45.7	50.8	55.9	61.0	66.0	71.1
Length	28"	29"	30"	31"	32"	33"
Half Chest	18"	20"	22"	24"	26"	28"

All measurements are of the garment laid flat, not body measurements.

Bella + Canvas 3001T

Units:

Measurement	2T	3T	4T	5T
Length	39.4	41.9	44.5	47
Half Chest	30.5	33	35.6	38.1
Sleeve Length	10.2	10.8	11.4	12
Length	15.5"	16.5"	17.5"	18.5"
Half Chest	12"	13"	14"	15"
Sleeve Length	4"	4.3"	4.5"	4.7"

All measurements are of the garment laid flat, not body measurements.

LAT 4424 / Larkwood 055 / Babybugz BZ010

Units:

Measurement	6M	12M	18M
Length	29.8	32.4	34.9
Half Chest	22.2	24.8	27.3
Length	11.7"	12.8"	13.7"
Half Chest	8.7"	9.8"	10.7"

All measurements are of the garment laid flat, not body measurements.

Delivered in 4–14 days. We're not Amazon, but we're trying.

A soft, cozy onesie for the newest and loudest member of your household. Gentle on sensitive skin, easy on parents, and printed with designs that are honestly more for you than them. They can't read yet. This one's for you.

Size up if your baby is between sizes. They won't know the difference but you will.

Machine wash cold, inside out.
Tumble dry low or hang to dry.
Do not bleach.
Do not iron directly on the print.

Printed to order with premium DTG (Direct-to-Garment) technology for crisp, vibrant colors that last.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Q: What sizes do you carry?
A: S through 3XL on most designs. Check the individual product page for the size chart — we mean it, check it.

Q: Do your shirts run true to size?
A: Mostly yes, but check the size chart anyway. We put it there for a reason and we're not responsible for optimistic sizing decisions.

Q: What are the shirts made of?
A: 100% cotton where we can help it. Soft enough to sleep in, sturdy enough to survive your questionable life choices. Check individual product pages for exact blend info.

Q: Will the design crack or fade?
A: Not if you treat it like an adult. Wash inside out, cold water, no dryer if you can avoid it. We use quality print-on-demand production — these aren't iron-ons from a craft fair.

Q: Can I change or cancel my order?
A: If you catch us fast enough, maybe. Email us immediately. Once it's in production, it's yours — but reach out and we'll see what we can do.

Q: Can I return or exchange my shirt?
A: We can't accept returns for sizing or preference, so please check the size guide before ordering. If your shirt arrives damaged or misprinted, email us and we'll fix it.

Q: How long does shipping take?
A: 5–10 business days in the US. You'll get a tracking number when it ships.

Q: Do you ship internationally?
A: Not yet. Mediocre Threads is currently a domestic operation. We're working on it. Probably.

Q: Do you restock sold out items?
A: Sometimes. Follow us on Instagram to find out when, or email us and ask nicely.

Q: Can I request a design?
A: You can try. We make no promises but we do read every email, mostly.

Q: Why is almost everything $25?
A: Because it should be. Low expectations. Solid results.

Q: Who made this brand?
A: A Minnesota musician with a bad sense of humor. You're welcome.

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